Thursday, March 25, 2010


I checked my email yesterday and what did my eyes fall upon but an email from the last person on earth I ever expected to here from again. I won’t get into boring details but suffice to say and old friend who I had a bad falling out with, very bad. I never wanted to hear from her again and, to be honest, I never wanted to set eyes on her again.

I had to walk around the block a couple times to clear my head, and we are talking big blocks here. I got all kinds of advice on what to do and finally decided to ignore the letter. But I did feel a bit sad, thinking maybe she had changed and at the same time thinking I really don’t care if she did.

So what am I getting at here? I was eating dinner last night and Ash’s girlfriend pulled out her handy little netbook (I want !!) and showed me what I am going to share here. Its not a perfect fit to my situation yet it is in some ways and I just had to smile.

“….Maybe it is real! But I just don’t know that people can change—permanently or just temporarily, conveniently, in your presence. And even if someone has changed, it doesn’t mean they can shed their former self like a layer of skin and just slither away. That skin is your baggage, man. You must carry that shit. And in acknowledging all of your layers of skin, you become real.”

Failing to Keep it Real

Maybe she has changed and maybe not, but I’m not at the point in my life where I need or want to find out. Maybe I never will be.