Monday, January 4, 2010


A few lessons Ive learned in my first days up here ....
  1. Bars being open on a Sunday is a blessing and a curse. I mean even I need a day to say 'oh no I'm not gonna today'
  2. I need a smaller bed ! And with that I'm to effing tall to live here !!
  3. I procrastinate and sometimes it kicks your ass. I wanted to have a new portfolio together before I moved and alas I didn't do squat. So now I have this week to do it if i want it finished before I start work. grrrrrr


emo. A word from hell. Yes I can be emo. I have a short temper that i have been know to lose on occasion. I have been trying to keep that reigned in. Sometimes successfully sometimes not.

But to understand me you have to understand one simple fact. My art is everything to me. Its comes first, last, and fills the middle. It has been that way since I first picked up a pink crayon and fucked up the bedroom walls. And to me all art flows from emotion. Maybe I'm wrong in that but it's how i feel. I know artists who think the exact opposite is true (artists are a weird bunch). Some people never seem to get that without the emo side I just wouldn't be who I am.

When I paint I put everything I have into it. I can go days living on nothing but coffee, alcohol, and cigarettes. No food, sleep, or contact with anybody. Court, who I lived with at PSU, would check every now and than just to make sure I was still alive. Than when I'm finished I go thru the biggest crash. It can last for days and is hard on anybody close to me. The last time i painted anything I fought with somebody for days after. And the sex sucked too! Now that is something you will rarely if ever hear me admit.

So where am I going with this. Who knows. But that's it for now.

saddest tune i ever heard

ugh thanks sis for sending me that

new pic