Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Observations from the Window 5.11

This is one of the rare moments when I do what I had planned on and write about my Second Life too. Along with some friends I had a very emotional couple of days last week. For well over two years I and two of my best friends in either life lived together on the sim of yet another friend. As my best friend wrote on flickr "a place we all lived, loved, danced, cried." In a matter of days it was gone. For reasons unknown the sim owner was suspended and gone forever and our land was offline.

"The region has been reactivated until tomorrow to allow you to reclaim your objects," was all Linden Labs would say and so Thursday became a night only Dante could imagine. I really can't think of words to describe how emotional I was. I named my land 'Paradise Lost' after the book in which John Milton wrote "The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven." It was my little piece of heaven, my escape, and a shelter from my sometimes stormy real life.

My friend can create beautiful jewelry, had a store, a workshop. It's something I never seemed to be able to transfer from real life and at times I had a hard time creating a box. I might not have created the pieces of my paradise but I created the whole out of the pieces I found. It was mine from the kites to the water lilies, from the movie posters on the walls of the house to the art work on the walls of the bedroom. It was my garden, my gallery, my home, it was my art, and now I miss it more than I thought I ever could.

I'm not quite sure why I even started writing this. I have had a debate with people now and than about emotions in sl. How I think a person has only have one set of emotions and that no matter how hard you try to be otherwise you can’t keep them separate. But I didn't even get into that here. I guess my friend was right when she said part of the grieving process is to admit it's alright to hurt and it does hurt. This is just my way of admitting it.

"Paradise Lost" seems a more fitting name than ever.

Israel Kamakawiwo'ole - Somewhere Over the Rainbow / What a Wonderful World