Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Observations from the Coffee Shop 5.31



the Outcast
Some random weirdness from an, as I predicted, decidedly weird Memorial Day weekend.

The New York smoking ban took effect this past weekend and a saw a piece on CNN about it. I won’t try and argue its pros and cons but pass on some insight from the CNN report. An Israeli man said everybody there smokes and everybody is amazingly healthy, must be the desert air. They showed a shot of the plaque in Washington Square Park with a cigarette butt crushed on it, I swear it wasn't mine. And finally there was a man who spoke the truth. He said that if we all quit smoking we would all gain weight and than the city would send out the twinkie patrol.

I was at the bar watching the Phillies play the Mets and had an interesting conversation with a bar regular who was fully attired in his Mets jersey and cap. He explained to me how he can tell which Phillies ace is pitching when he isn't close enough to the TV to see the name or hear the play by play. Keep in mind this is was coming from a middle-aged guy with the deepest Brooklyn accent. His method is to check out the body because Roy Halladay and Cliff Lee are both 'big guys' but Lee is way more 'cut' and athletic looking. Cole Hamels is tall too but he has a 'scrawny modelish' body and Roy Oswalt is shorter with an 'ample' midsection. I kid you not those were his exact words. I couldn’t bring myself to ask about the relief pitchers.

As I recently discovered it was not only Memorial Day but Fleet Week here in New York and the sailors were everywhere with their oil cans of Fosters beer. I think I might need to buy me a little sailor outfit and than I too can drink a beer as I walk down the street. What just amazed me again this year was how many of them show up around the galleries and how many seem to think that I am just what they need to make their Fleet Week in New York perfect. Nothing like getting hit on by a straight guy in uniform whose line of sight is slightly below my neck. I never did see many women sailors and had to wonder where they all went for the week. I was thinking maybe they went to the strip clubs but that's just a theory of mine. Maybe next year I'll find out, that is if I remember its Fleet Week in the first place.

I had more to share but a pulled pork sandwich is screaming my name. I'll get back to you.