Observations from the Window 4.15

I’m sitting in the window indulging my passion for Philly sports, NY teams be damned. Luckily the Flyers playoff game is on cable because I guess I have to get used to not watching the Phils. Hell I’m going to miss that, their best start in years and i can't watch. At the same time I'm catching up on some reading too.

So than I ran across a column on drug addiction that just pissed me off. I know I have mentioned my addictive personality before. My drug probs and trip to rehab, all water under the blog bridge I guess. But something in this just grabbed me by the throat and shook me a bit. This is the exact quote ….

‘Most people who take up drug addiction ….’

Huh? Or to be more precise, WTF ?? Take up drug addiction. How can anybody in their right mind say something like that? Yeah take up drug addiction, like you take up knitting or fishing.

I didn’t want to ‘take up’ something that stole a month of my life. Stole that time so completely that at times I can’t remember any of it at all. From a trip to the shore, to driving my car into a ditch, and than landing in rehab, most of a summer of my life gone forever. And the thing is the addiction is never totally gone. Not really. Some people think you can cheat, just once, one line can’t hurt. But it’s not like that at all. One line could send me back into that dark pit, that little corner of hell I was in, and this time I might not climb out. So I guess I live with that till the day I die.

So ‘take it up’?? What the hell are you thinking?

For the record the Urban Dictionary defines cocaine as "A drug that is so important that you lie to the people that you love and steal from the people that trust you." Sounds about right.

I guess I’m just rambling here. Pissed off by a written line. I’m not sure but I think this is why I started this blog in the first place. Sometimes I just need to ramble, vent, and blow off some steam so my brain doesn’t implode.

Life goes on

'.... I only want you to see
My favorite part of me
And not my ugly side
Not my ugly side ....'

tuneage, Blue October - Ugly Side