Friday, December 10, 2010

Thirty Days of Truths, Day 22

Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life ....

Christ does it have to be something I haven't already mentioned? I'm not sure thinking about what you wish you hadn't done in your life is the best use of time but I'll give it a shot anyway. Can I make a list?

I wish that I hadn't sat on Santa's lap when I was three and, well, OK I puked on Santa. I have yet to live that one down and for some reason it seems to come up every year at this time. Rumor has it that there are pics floating around too. Now there might be a few things I have done in my life that I don't want to become public knowledge but those pics I would kill for.

In something totally second life related I wish that when I first started I had known it was quite possible to have two hairs on at the same time. Actually I wish somebody had told me I had two hairs on at the same time instead of probably laughing their asses off. Believe me I remember and I took names. It may take years but I'll get even at some point so be careful opening that Christmas card this year.

I wish that I hadn't slid my car into a ditch that night. More than that I wish I hadn't given the police officer that found me a rude gesture. I'm not going to say what the gesture was but if you look around this page you might just find it. Needless to say he wasn't that thrilled about it and not surprisingly neither was my dad when I called him from the local lock up.

And finally I wish I hadn't punched that guy in the bar the night he called me a dyke. How did I know I was going to lay him out with one punch? Worse than that was the fact I had to call Ash to bail me out of jail. This is yet another thing I am never going to live down because she never lets me forget that she was the one who had to bail me out. To this day I feel so bad thinking about the embarrassment he must of felt being knocked down in public by of all things a tall skinny dyke.

So there you have my wish I hadn't done list.

Alright so I lied about the last one. Actually it was one of the proudest moments of my life. I mean seriously my dykes can call me a dyke, my friends can call me a dyke, but no asshole in a bar is going to call me a dyke and get away with it. Jail time is but a small price to pay.

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